The Neuroscience Behind Hot-Headed Emails

MURALI DORAISWAMY: It’s easy to lose one’s cool in the fast-paced, react-now, high-stress world of business—just look at the emails or tweets that have come back to haunt so many leaders these days. And there’s a scientific explanation for why it’s can be so easy for any of us to fire off insensitive or angry tirades.

By scanning people’s brains while they’re making decisions, scientists have discovered that, when stress or emotions are involved (as they often are in the workplace), people’s thinking patterns change. When we’re calm, the frontal lobes of our brains guide slow, rational thinking; this is called “cold cognition.” But when we’re aroused—by stress, anger, or even love—spur-of-the-moment, impulsive “hot cognition” decisions are made by the emotionally-driven limbic system and amygdala, which hijacks information before it’s ever even processed the more logical frontal lobes.

At the same time neuroscientists have revealed how this “hot cognition” system can overpower our brains, science has also revealed some ways we can fight back. So if you’re faced with a stressor—a complaining client or financial crisis—here’s what neuroscience says you should do before confronting the situation to avoid making a potentially costly mistake:

• Be aware that emotions are tied to altered decision making. Simply having this awareness, and noticing you’re fired up, can help you step back from sending an email or making a phone call until your stress or anger has calmed.
• If you can’t sleep on a decision, turn to meditation or have a ritual that helps you calm down on a faster time scale than overnight. They key is to get keep your amygdala from making a rash decision.
• Pretend you’re giving advice to your best friend about how to deal with the situation. When you’re giving advice to someone else, neuroscientists have shown, your brain automatically uses the “cold cognition” system.
• Likewise, get advice from a close friend about how to deal with the stressor; they’ll likely have a less emotionally charged perspective.

Interestingly, some studies suggest that women (often considered the more emotional sex) are more likely than men to take a step back before rushing to act in stressful situations – another reason to have greater gender equity in leadership teams.

Dr. P. Murali Doraiswamy is professor of psychiatry and medicine at Duke University Medical Center, where he also serves as a member of the Duke Institute of Brain Sciences and as a senior fellow at the Duke Center for the Study of Aging and Human Development.